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A dog’s life and a new home: The Wellesley Grove Journal

A weekly account of the curious goings-on in the world of financial services

Dog-gone, I lost my savings
As the Money and Pensions Service tells us: “Your bed is great for many things – but storing your savings certainly isn’t one of them.”

Like everyone else though, this WGJ reporter has more than one distant older relative who favours this particular style of banking. MAPS also outlines that cash lost, damaged or potentially burnt inside your house cannot be reimbursed by the Financial Services Compensation Scheme.

But WGJ wonders what happens if the disappearance of said money involves a hungry dog? This week, Sky reported that a nine-year old labradoodle in Llandudno, North Wales, had eaten part of its owner’s savings. Ozzie ate his way through an envelope of cash, vomiting up £130. WGJ would like to point out that the dog was perfectly fine after this odd meal. However, the regurgitated funds did not cover the vet bill!

The comforts of Croydon
The Money Marketing team is now well into its first week in the new Croydon office and most of the teething problems have sorted themselves out. Our Wellesley Grove home is significantly newer and more interesting on the inside, but perhaps not as exciting outside when compared with the wilds of Wells Street in London’s West End.

So far, WGJ has been most impressed by its new owner’s choice of microwave. The ratio of microwaves to staff is impressively high, while they also seem to emanate all the efficiencies of an electric car and make no sound whatsoever.

On the other hand, WGJ’s correspondents almost froze to death on the first day. This was a combination of strong air-conditioning and having not felt anything remotely resembling fresh air in their former office. That problem has also been rectified and WGJ is feeling both comfy and content.

Out of context

“Scottish Widows should really be called ‘Most Scottish Women’”

Presenter Danny Wallace notes that the average life expectancy of men in Scotland is 42

“You know  the bit where the lost boys eat a make-believe meal?”

One Headlinemoney Awards attendee compares the dessert to the 1991
film Hook

“Masochists with a burpee twist…”

Yellowtail Financial Planning’s Dennis Hall remembers Armed Forces physical training instructors

Separated at birth 

Former Money Marketing editor Roger Anderson

DJ Wes Baggaley
Send your suggestions to @mm_wsj.

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