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The Wells Street Journal: Phone a clone and haircuts and homebrew

Out of context

“If you hear any music, don’t worry, it’s not my iPod.”

Pimfa’s Liz Field apologises to MM after train delays force her to dash into a coffee shop for an interview

“Paid in wine please.”

Yardstick Agency Founder Phil Bray jokes about his payment preference after giving financial planning personality Phil Billingham a plug on Twitter

“Couldn’t resist putting Geoffrey Boycott’s headphones on.”

AJ Bell’s Tom Selby was made up with a visit to the Lord’s media box

Haircuts and homebrew

It can be hard to communicate to clients an accurate vision of their future, but the Australians have come up with a master metaphor to solve this problem. By equating retirement savings to real life expenditures, the back-to-basics method aims to help people visualise their future lives through booze and barnets. According to the Aussies’ easy-to-understand retirement targets, someone relying on the equivalent of the Australian state pension will spend their retirement drinking homebrew and asking friends to cut their hair. A “modest retirement” includes the luxuries of boxed wine and regular haircuts – but only on pensioner special day. And finally – the crème de la crème – the sought-after “comfortable retirement” promises bottled wine and haircuts at a ‘good’ hairdresser. This WSJ correspondent wonders when haircuts became a symbol of economic success.

Phone a clone

For those in urgent need of a chief economist, fear no more. Swiss investment bank UBS has stretched the laws of time, allowing chief economist Daniel Kalt to be in multiple places at once. By cloning the economist, UBS has provided customers with the ability to talk to the resultant digital human at any time, in any place. Kalt’s digital alter ego can respond to a range of questions on which he has educated it, however it will not attempt to answer questions it does not know the answer to. WSJ appreciates the nod to modernity, but can questions requiring a chief economist’s expert view be adequately answered by a pre-programmed robot? Kalt undermines his job by implying it can be done by a digital clone.

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