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Protection racket

Lifesearch senior technical adviser Kevin Carr and Friends Provident head of protection marketing Peter Hamilton are hereby banned from consuming alcohol together or getting anywhere near a karaoke machine.

This is what happens when the world of pop and protection collide. Sing these words, if you can bear it, to the tune of Robbie Williams’s Angels.

I sit and wait while an underwriter contemplates my fate…

And do they know, the places where I go, where it’s grey and cold?’Cos I’ve been told that disclosure puts my claim on holdSo when I’m lying in my bed, medication running through my headAnd my CI claim is dead, I’m loving IP instead’Cos through it all, she offers me protection, income and indexation,so I can keep holding onAnd though down the stairs I fall, there’s no increase in my fee, I know that life office won’t break me when I come to callShe won’t stop paying me, I’m loving IP insteadWhen I’m feeling weak and I can’t even walk down my own streetYou look at me and you know my claim will always be paid tax freeAnd as the income rose, the right advice I’d chose’Cos when my CI claim is dead, I’m loving IP instead

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