Wells Street Journal: Dampier’s brush with death

Scorpion

Is Hargreaves Lansdown’s research pro Mark Dampier the new Bear Grylls?

At first glance the two appear to have very different lives: one is a respected fund researcher, while the other sleeps in a camel carcass to keep warm.

However, Dampier has been honing his explorer skills in preparation to take Gryll’s place in the spotlight.

He started with a trip to Mexico, where he roamed the jungle and practiced his spear fishing skills. He then moved on to the mean streets of New York to navigate the urban jungle (and do some Christmas shopping).

What Dampier hadn’t banked on was bringing a piece of the jungle back with him. After an essential research trip to a New York Knicks game, Dampier’s wife, Annette, spotted a scorpion (pictured) on his back.

Dealing with the situation like a true explorer Dampier whipped his jumper off and flung the scorpion across the room. It is unclear whether he screamed like a five-year-old girl.

A hunting expedition to find the offending arachnid came up short, so the Dampiers went to bed, with the fearless Hargreaves man keeping watch all night.

Having fled the hotel room the next day under the guise of attending fund manager research meetings, Mrs Dampier was left to find and catch the killer creature.

Further investigation revealed the scorpion was a deadly variety, killing one in four people it stings. Sources say Dampier will be using the scorpion in his future meetings to extract charges information from fund managers.