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Ditch Shoreditch, Lansons

Non-metrosexuals, please forgive us but we hear tell that the Lansons Party is moving from what is these days the well-heeled borough of Clerkenwell to London’s silliest locale, Shoreditch.

For those readers outside the Smoke, this may not mean much but it is a place where the youth and not so youth of London, generally living off mummy and daddy’s income, dress very sillily, especially the boys, listen to lousy music and drink into the early hours. They also look down on everyone else in the mistaken belief they are the first generation in the world to have discovered these things.

We have to wonder if the Lansons’ boys – yes, they have quite a few of those these days – will be sporting the haircut known popularly in London as the Hoxton Tw*t, a sculpted multi-directional affair, wearing trousers that are so thin Twiggy could not get into them and with a backside that starts at the back of the knee, rendering the wearer into looking like they have really tiny legs and have just wet themselves.

We also wonder if Tony Langham will be turning up on a skateboard. The Diary will keep you posted.

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