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Comply with me

The Diary has found a task for its readers – to come up with the ideal hold music for our friends at Canary Wharf.

Our man at the FSA has expressed a willingness to listen to any suggestions.

So whether you think it should be that old Rolling Stones number Under My Thumb or perhaps Sympathy for the Devil – or maybe something more classical along the lines of Wagner&#39s Ride of the Valkyries – the Diary is confident the ideal song is out there.

Please send any suggestions to Diary editor Alison Bone at alison.bone@centaur.co.uk and we will publish those that make us titter the most.

•The Diary has learned that, after checking in with his team for a flight from Heathrow Airport, Bright Grey&#39s Mark Locke just could not leave London behind and returned to the City.

Locke claims he had left his house keys in a London hotel room.

Perhaps the beleaguered Hibs fan wanted one more glance at the silverware at London&#39s top two football clubs after Bright Grey&#39s IFA roadshows at Stamford Bridge and Highbury.

Musing upon the sights of Hounslow as he whipped through on the Heathrow Express, could the Scotsman be heard twittering to the tune of Maybe It&#39s Because I&#39m A Londoner?

•The Diary hears that the man leading Labour&#39s courageous charge towards early entry into the euro has caused a few titters among his fellow Parliamentarians.

Following the purple flour bombing, many MPs remained shaken but not stirred. However, it seems that Labour MP for Rhonnda Chris Bryant was more disturbed than most.

Bryant, who chairs the Labour Movement for Europe, recounted his tale of terror to a regional paper. Copies of his interview with a My Brush With Death-style headline have circulated among the 399 other Parliamentarians involved in the attack.

Former Tory leader IDS was reportedly incandescent with rage when the Speaker failed to listen to his warnings not to evacuate the building. The Diary wonders if the Speaker could hear the quiet man&#39s wailings.

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